A small balding man storms into a local bar and demands, �Gimme a double of the strongest whiskey you got. I�m so mad, I can�t even see straight.�
The bartender, noticing that the little man is a bit the worse for wear, pours him a double of Southern Comfort.
The man swills down the drink and says, �Gimme another one.�
The bartender pours the drink, but says, �Now, before I give you this, why don�t you let off a little steam and tell me why you�re so upset?�
So, the man begins his tale. �Well, I was sitting in the bar next door, when this gorgeous blonde slinks in and actually sits beside me at the bar. I thought, �Wow, this has never happened before.� You know, it was kind of a fantasy come true. Well, a couple of minutes later, the blonde leans over and asks if I�d like to come back to her hotel to have dinner and talk for a while. I couldn�t believe this was happening, and I hadn�t had a good meal in quite a while. I managed to nod my head yes, so she grabs my hand and starts walking out of the bar. This
seemed just too good to be true.�
He continued, �She took me down the street here to a nice hotel and up to her room. She said to relax, watch some TV, and that she would be ready to go down to the restaurant in a few minutes. But, as soon as I put my feet
up and reclined my chair, I heard some keys jingling and someone starts fumbling with the door.�
�The blonde says, �Oh my god, it�s my boyfriend. He must have lost his wrestling match tonight, he�s gonna be real mad. Quick, hide!��
�So, I opened the closet, but I figured that was probably the first place he would look, so I didn�t hide there. Then I looked under the bed, but no, I figured he�s bound to look there, too. By now, I could hear the key in the lock. I noticed the window was open, so I climbed out and was hanging there by my fingers, praying that the guy wouldn�t see me.�
The bartender says �Well I can see how you might be a bit
frustrated at this point.�
�Well, yeah, but I hear the guy finally get the door open and he yells out, �Who you been with now, you witch?� The girl says, �Nobody, honey, now calm down.��
Well, the guy starts tearing up the room. I hear him tear the door off the closet and throw it across the room. I�m thinking, �Boy, I�m glad I didn�t hide in there.� Then I hear him lift up the bed and throw it across the room. Good thing I didn�t hide under there either. Then I heard him say, �What�s that over there by the window?� I think,
�Oh God, I�m dead meat now.�
But, the blonde by now is trying real hard to distract him and convinces him to stop looking. Well, I hear the guy go into the bathroom and I hear water running for a long time; I figure maybe he�s gonna take a bath or something, when all of a sudden, the jerk pours a pitcher of scalding hot water out of the window right on top of my head. I
mean, look at this, I got second degree burns all over my scalp and shoulders!�
The bartender says, �Oh man, that would have gotten me mad for sure.� �No, that didn�t really bother me. Next, the guy
starts slamming the window shut over and over on my hands. I mean, look at my fingers. They�re a bloody mess. I can hardly hold onto this glass.�
The bartender looks at the guy�s hands and says, �Yeah, buddy, I can understand why you are so upset.�
�No, that wasn�t what really got me so angry though.�
The bartender then asks in exasperation, �Well, then, what did finally make you angry?�
�Well, I was hanging on the window, and I turned around and
looked down, I was only about six inches off the ground.�